The horrors persist but so do we -Yet another dialogue with my subconscious

Subconscious: For the love of God and all that is holy, snap out of this lover boy era and please for once start focusing on the challenges that lie ahead.

Me: Snap out of it you say, as if it's a switch to be turned off. I love her. Love is not something that can be "switched off" at will. It is much more complicated than that.

Subconscious: Why is that so? I mean she is just another girl. Go out into God's big wide open world and you'll find a million others like her.

Me: What I feel for her is something that I have never, and I repeat NEVER, felt for anyone else my entire life. Ever since I have met her the sky seems a little more bluer, the grass a little more greener, the nights a little more serene and the days a little more placid. I can go on till kingdom come, about how much she means to me but I am afraid words won't do justice to the feelings I have for her. To you she may just be, yet another girl. To me though, she is the center of my universe.

Subconscious: Yeah yeah yeah, whatever. Dude get a grip of yourself, stop with this nonsense. I bet you the world, she doesn't think nearly half as much of you, as you do of her. Morning, noon, night you think of her and to what avail? She still for the most part ignores you. Toor my dear boy, I hate to be the one breaking this to you, but you are probably not even a footnote in her life. Not even an afterthought of her's. So stop ripping your heart out everyday, cutting it open and putting it up on display in the hopes of her perhaps, just maybe, turning back to look at you.

Me: Do you think I don't already know that. I am perfectly well aware of the fact that I probably am not even a footnote or an afterthought of her's yet I still choose to drown away the pain with thoughts of her. I will always choose her. And whilst there may be a million, no perhaps a billion, others like her, they are all like her and not her for she is incomparable. She to me is the what the sun is to the moon. The moon has no light of it's own and merely reflects light from the sun. She is my sun. She is my moon. She is my world. She is my universe. And whilst I may not even be an afterthought or a footnote to her, to me she'll always be my everything.

Subconscious: She'll always be our everything

Me: The horrors persist but so do we.

Subconscious: and so do us.



Keep me in your heart for a while, you'll be in mine forever

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