Walking through a bed of roses: Milena my love -You'll be in my heart forever

15 days from today I will be sitting the medicine exam again. There's still no sign of a reply from the uhs to my recount application and therefore I will probably in all likelihood have to sit the supplementary exam. In hindsight I think it's a good thing that I didn't spend ages waiting for their reply and miss out on the last date of filing my exam forms.

Anyways, this is going to be my last blog post until I am done with atleast the written part of the supplementary exam and well, it's going to be about her.

Milena, you are amazing (with a lot of Gs at the end). I don't know how many times I must have said this to her and I don't know what she thought of it, but every time I said it, what I really meant to say was that I wished for the space time-continuum to stop and for this moment, our moment, to last forever. It's a shame that time moves on and that too so quickly. 

She will never realize just how important she is to me. The past few days have been hell, many a time I've thought of giving up, throwing it all away, and as stupid as it may sound, sitting the sat and going to college all over again. Of the two things that have kept me from doing this are one my parents and two the prospect, however minute it may be, of us happening someday somehow.

If I were to say that she means the world to me it would be an understatement. She means a lot more than the world to me. To me she was my happiest accident. I do sometimes think about what would've happened had I not brought that flyer home, would we have ever met, would things ever get this far?

Whilst it's impossible for me to find out what would or could have happened, I do know this: God intended for us to meet, we met and he has brought us this far. I don't know what is going to happen next, but I do sincerely from the bottom of my heart believe that the God who has brought us this far will get us across. It could very well be wishful thinking on my part, but who knows perhaps she may actually choose me after all or perhaps not.

And even if she doesn't choose me, the days we were together were easily the happiest days of my life. I honestly fail to recall the last time I was as happy as when I was talking to her. It felt like a 5 year old let loose in a candy shop, it felt like sunshine after a cold winter's night, it felt like a wish come true. I will always be grateful to her for making me feel this way. Always.

Milena, if you're reading this I want you to know that you are always in my thoughts and not a second of a minute of an hour of a day goes by when you're not. I don't know about you but I have loved you from the very moment I laid my eyes upon you. I have at times been impatient and at times frustrated, I think anybody going through what I am going through would have acted the same. Nevertheless I do apologize if I have at any point hurt your feelings. 

I hope you'll keep me in your heart for a while, you'll be in mine forever.

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

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